If you’re going through a divorce as a parent, you should aim to reduce conflict as much as you can. At least attempt to be civil with your ex as you sort things out.
This may not feel fair. Maybe they were unfaithful to the marriage, and you feel like your outrage is justified. But it is best for the children.
The problem is that a high-conflict divorce can be very hard on them. It’s stressful. It takes a long time. Some parents use their kids as pawns. All of this makes it harder for children to adjust, and it can make them feel like the divorce is their fault. Even if your feelings are justified, if you’re able to keep them to yourself, know that you are doing what is best for your children, even though it’s harder for you.
How can you do this?
There are a lot of tactics you can use, and one is just focusing on similar goals as your ex. For instance, you both want the children to have a stable life after the divorce. Make decisions that will give them that, and you’ll feel more like you’re working together.
You can also use communication methods that help you keep everything in check. Many parents in your position struggle to talk face-to-face, and for a good reason. You may be better off working out some of the details via email or text, or simply on the phone. Pick what works best for you.
Exploring your options
Of course, you also want to look into all of your legal options to ensure that you stay involved in your child’s life.